It’s said that we really only fall in love with three people in our lifetime and each of these loves are for a different reason. And I have been privileged to fall in love with two people.

First it was my very long best friend who we are no longer close like we used. And people told me that I was too young to understand what love was and all that I felt was infatuation. I believed that that was going to be my only love and that was what love was supposed to be. It took me four years to accept that what we thought would be would’ve never been.

My second and most recent love was quite overwhelming because this love was my hardest. This love came with a lot of lessons and it was an emotional roller coaster of extreme highs and lows and like a junkie trying to get a fix, I stuck through the lows with the expectation of the high.

I had fallen so hard and deep for this guy, his smile, his laugh, his imperfections, his everything. It was as if love was brewed in the morning, fresh and breathtaking. His love was like whiskey, it warmed my heart and left me craving for more. It was the perfect balance of straight, edgy and crazy. I didn’t know my capacity to love until I loved him.  I didn’t know how beautiful broken crayons colored until I met him. He made me laugh a little harder, he hugged me a little tighter and I fell a little harder. Love felt so right it didn’t feel real. 

Memories are wonderful but sometimes they can be devastating.

This love taught me about how I wanted and needed to be loved. It taught me to never settle for less and taught me how to love myself. 

My third and final love, the love I’m yet to experience and the one I’ll never see it coming. The one that will come so easy it won’t seem possible. The kind where the connection can’t be explained and will knock me off my feet because I never planned for it. It will just be two people who are tired of having to try and having their broken hearts lay beating in front of them wondering if there is something inherently wrong with how they love. But this kind of love will remind us why it never worked out before. The love that will feel like home and resonate with our souls. 

Darling, it’s this possibility that makes trying again always worthwhile because I’ll never know when I’ll stumble into love.

Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning.