22 LESSONS LEARNT IN 22 YEARS



I recently celebrated my birthday on the 27th September and throughout my 22 years I’ve learnt a lot. In as much as it’s a new year for me, I can’t help but look back at all the things I’ve learnt in my life. I believe looking back at your life and realizing everything you’ve been through and all the lessons you’ve learned is an important step before moving forward.

22 lessons I’ve learnt:

1. Be you.
When I wrote WHY AM I AFRAID TO TELL YOU WHO I AM? I spilled a part of me that people didn’t know even my close friends. I wanted to be honest with everyone and that included ME. My advice don’t be afraid to be yourself.

2. Always believe in yourself.
I need to print this out and paste it all over the place as a reminder. This took me a long time to learn but I’m slowly getting there. Be confident and don’t doubt yourself.

3. Don’t hold in your emotions.
For a long time I mastered and perfected this art well but over time I learnt that it wasn’t good for me because it would often lead to an explosion at the worst times. If you’re feeling a certain talk about it or even write about it. Just get it out so it doesn’t bottle up inside.

4. Walk away from toxic people.
In my article LOSING YOU WAS A BLESSING, I managed to walk away from my toxic relationship which wasn’t an easy thing to do. You don’t need to keep people in your life who constantly bring you down or make you feel bad about yourself. You deserve happiness so walk away from anything or anybody that makes you feel less than.

5. Forgive but only when you feel absolutely ready too.
Forgiveness is hard whew and sometimes it takes time. It took me a long time to forgive my dad because that FIRST CUT WAS THE DEEPEST. Forgive not because you’re doing it for them but do it for you.

6. It’s okay to cry.
One thing I’ve to admit is I’m a crier, I literally cry when I’m happy, sad, angry even when I’m confused. I used to think being emotional was a sign of weakness but it’s not and it’s a sign of being human.

7. There’s always light at the end of the tunnel.
It might seem dim, distant and hard to reach but it remains flickering. Everything happens for a reason.

8. Life isn’t fair, but it’s great.
I’m reminded of this on a daily basis; life is rough, tough and always throwing you curveballs that you can’t dodge. The road isn’t straight and there’s no manual unfortunately. Make mistakes and learn from them.

9. It’s okay to not be okay.
I’ve for a while suffered from depression and anxiety and felt the pressure to always put a façade that I was always happy and hide the darkness that lied behind my smile. With depression at times there’s no apparent reason for why you’re feeling that way. Be brave to go through it to get over it.

10. Perfection doesn’t exist
I’ve spent so much time and I cried so many tears because no matter what I did, I couldn’t seem to reach the perfection I saw in other people. They’d better skin, prettier hair and lived perfect lives but it’s all an illusion because perfection doesn’t exist. I’ve stopped trying to achieve the impossible.

11. Love yourself
I’ve gone through my own share of insecurities and have done the whole “I hate this about myself” meltdown a million times but at the end of the day I can’t change who I am and so I learn how to learn myself every day.

12. Sometimes you’ve to just walk away
This is one of the hardest life lessons because it’s difficult to just up and leave something, be it a task, job, educational course or relationship etc. behind but if it no longer serves you it has to be done away with.

13. The right people will appreciate every part of you, good or bad.
The people meant for you will always refrain from nitpicking you at every opportunity.

14. Your hard work will pay off eventually.
It’s so easy to start working towards a dream but get overwhelmed or not see instant results so you just stop. When I began this blog there are a lot of times I felt like quitting but I’d to push myself because blogging makes me happy and for the past few months I’ve been blogging I’ve made so much progress.

15. Don’t take breakups personally
Oh boy! This is a tough lesson and it has taken so many heartbreaks to realize that maybe it didn’t end because of something I did or said. Maybe it ended because of the simple fact that me and that person weren’t meant be.

16. Hold your loved ones close.
I’ve lost so many friends and I’ve been heartbroken but I still have many friends and family who are always there for me and lifting me up. I will never take them for granted and I’ll always love them.

17. Learn to say NO
I used to be ultimate people pleaser and never wanted to hurt people’s feelings but I’ve learned that if you didn’t want to do something or go somewhere with somebody, say NO.

18. Self-care isn’t selfish
Sometimes you just need a day to dedicate to yourself, take a bubble bath, buy something nice that you’ve wanted for a long time, or just have a quiet night to yourself. Put yourself first for a day.

19. You should never beg somebody to stay in your life PERIODT!
Whether it’s a friend, a family member or a significant other let them go if they want to walk away because holding on will only hurt more in the end.

20. Failure is okay.
Life is all trial and error. If you don’t succeed at first, try again!

21. Dwelling over small mistakes isn’t worth it
I’m the type of person who’ll replay every small mistake I ever made and try to think about how I could’ve changed it but the reality is, I can’t.
22. You can be badass with a good heart.
Yes darling, you can have a good heart and still badass and that's called balance.

Thank you for reading. Until next time my loves kisses.



4 comments

  1. Dear walking a away from toxic people is one best advice everyone should put into practice. They are very backwards... Loving yourself is another point.. cos if you love yourself so much then they got nothing on you.

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    1. That’s true 👌🏽 Thank you darling ❤️

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