I’ve debated for a
long while about writing about this because the last thing I want is to look like
I want sympathy or attention, but I’m mainly doing this for myself and for
those who can relate to my story. PCOS can be isolating, and I don’t want
anyone to feel as though they are alone.
Let’s dive right in shall we?
At the age of 20 I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian
Syndrome) but all my life I always suspected I had it because it ran in my
family.
What is PCOS?
Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome is a condition in which certain
hormones are out of balance caused by a number of cysts or fluid filled sacs on
their ovaries.
What are the symptoms of PCOS?
PCOS signs and symptoms vary but can include: Irregular
periods, or no periods at all, difficulty conceiving, hair loss, excess male
hormones, weight gain, bloating etc.
I have always exhibited signs of PCOS since adolescence and
once puberty kicked in, the changes started manifesting themselves.
The first thing that was visible was my horrific acne. Most people
especially in the teen years, experience acne but my experience wasn’t a pimple
here or there. My acne was primarily on my face but also my chest and back. My
horrific acne was the beginning of my self-esteem tanking and every time I looked
at the mirror I never felt beautiful. There was a time in my life I never
looked at myself in the mirror because I was afraid to see the ugly reflection
of my face.
I not only had self-esteem because of my acne but I was
constantly reminded by the people around me of how ugly I looked. As a young
teenager girl, it felt horrible and I remember crying almost every now and
then. My parents took me to several dermatologists, I tried every product and
portion under the sun but nothing seemed to work. You know how people will
advise you to take 8 glasses of water and every pimple that’s on your body will
magically disappear, that wasn’t my case. I was left with a full bladder I had
to empty every 5 minutes and still an ugly face.
As the years progressed, so did the acne. It became cystic
and just plain painful. The
doctors would always try to treat it, but never looked more in-depth as to why I
had this issue in the first place. I often heard the words “you’ll outgrow it”
(guess who’s still waiting for that day? Me)
The other common sign that really affected me was hirsutism.
Lord how I wanted to bury myself in the ground every time someone made fun of
the little moustache that grew on my upper lip. I remember a time when boys
used to call me “mubaba” meaning man and I would run to the staffroom crying
because of that. But over the years, I’ve brushed the insults under the rug
because I cannot let people bring me down because of that.
The years went by and I just concluded to myself that I was
a normal teenager experiencing puberty and this phase will soon be over once I become
a young adult but I was wrong.
There was a time around winter when I suspected something
was wrong. When I was walking home after school I would get a sharp pain in my lower
right abdomen about where you’d expect your appendix to be. The pain was sudden
and it was excruciating and would go away after about 5-10 minutes of
inactivity. Walking back home was a difficult task that day because it was too painful
to walk. When I got home I called a friend who agreed to go with me to the
hospital the following day.
At the gynecologist’s office, I was freaked out I actually
cried because what I’d been suspecting would actually be confirmed. The doctor
did a pap smear and concluded I had flu in my ovaries. Flu in my ovaries?!! That
had been the most absurd thing I ever heard in my life. But he was the doctor
and I had to believe him right? So he gave me an antibiotics prescription and
told me it would be fine and I should cover up since the pain was as a result
of the cold. After I completed my prescription, I felt fine and I didn’t bother
going back to the doctor.
Because ovarian cysts have the potential of being cancerous,
it is important to see your doctor right away if you experience any of the
symptoms associated with it.
This included:
- Pain in the pelvic region
- Loss of appetite
- Weight loss
- Distended or full abdomen
- Nausea
- Changes in bowl movement
- Low energy
- Urinary urgency
- Changes in menstruation
Most ovarian cysts are not cancerous, especially during a
woman’s reproductive years. Nevertheless, it is important to pay attention to
your body and seek medical advice if you suspect something is wrong.
During winter I experienced the pain a lot but told myself it’ll be over
soon since the doctor had said it’s ‘flu in the ovaries’. After winter I would
be fine I reminded myself.
After a few months, the pain subsided and it was a relief
but I spoke too soon because the pain came back 10 times worse during summer.
It was too painful to walk because the pain on my lower pelvic region was
unbearable. I immediately scheduled an appointment with a gynecologist.
The
doctor I saw was better than the last one and despite our language barrier we
were able to communicate and explained to her all my signs and symptoms. She
did a Pap smear test, a pelvic ultrasound and a blood test and after a week I came
back for my results and she confirmed my fears.
She told me I had cysts in both my ovaries but assured me that
it would be fine but I had to make certain changes in my life. I saw her for a
couple of weeks and even though my health was improving according to her I didn’t
feel the same way. Ever since my confirmed diagnosis, my mental health had
drastically declined and I was really depressed. I cried myself to sleep every
night because I was stuck with this for the rest of my life and this syndrome
posed other potential threats such as diabetes if it isn’t treated.
So I went online did my research, watched other women talk
about their PCOS stories and how they encouraged people to visit a couple of
other doctors before concluding you’ve PCOS since you might be misdiagnosed in
some situations.
I made another
appointment with another gynecologist because I didn’t want to have the opinion
of only one doctor. So she carried out the same tests the previous doctor did
and the syndrome was still there. My biggest challenge was my mental health
because I was still in denial and I felt alone during the entire period. It’s
not easy being sick in a foreign country.
My story is just
one of millions. PCOS affects everyone differently and there isn’t enough research
and professional knowledge around it for us all to receive proper treatment. If
you are diagnosed with PCOS I urge you to reach out and connect with other
women going through the same thing. There are so many support groups on Facebook.
It’s scary and you feel alone but you are not.
Thank you for
taking time to read my story and please feel free to tell me about your journey
with PCOS in the comments below.
No comments:
Post a Comment